Tuesday October 23, 2012
Cleaning Lady Day: The dreaded day of the cleaning lady (Na.) had arrived. When the cleaning lady, Na. postponed her typical Monday date to Tuesday this week, we thanked God abundantly for the reprieve on Monday so we could catch up on some sleep & laundry after our busy weekend. Ab. said she thinks Na. brings the rain…as it is ALWAYS cold, rainy and miserable on the days we have to be out of the house from 9am-5pm. Now my US friends, imagine the dread you feel when you have to leave the house with the kids on a rainy day to run errands all day. And all the Mommies groan…uuuuuuuugh. NOW, imagine that grey, dismal, raining day, only colder, with no car or van to take you where you need to go- walking for miles and miles with bundled up, damp children dodging puddles and overspray from cars racing by, carrying grocery bags. That is why we dread Cleaning Day! :) This has given me a new perspective on our Cleaning Day at home, where our cleaning lady, Yours Truly, and her team (AJA plus a new J now), clean most of the day on Saturdays at home. I have to say, sloshing around town in the cold rain with dilapidated umbrellas from 9-5 has given me new appreciation for Sat. Chores at home in shorts and a t-shirtJ . But the shiny clean floors and bathrooms are nice to come home to here, as well, so we will be thankful for Na. :)
So now, back to our Tuesday. Na. showed up an HOUR early! Yikes! All of the kids were still in bed and I was barely conscious after staying up until 5 am to finish my blog! I had set my alarm to allow myself a full 2 hours of sleep (does that remind anyone of Elf, “Did you get any sleep?””I got a FULL 45 minutes!”) In addition, before I even got out of bed for Na., the doorbell rang and the water delivery man had arrived. Stumbling sleepily to the door, peering out the peek hole to see who it was, and fumbling with the key was an adventure in sleep deprivation. (Side note: Speaking of the water man….we are blessed. Our incredible host’s finance, Ir., is a strikingly beautiful Ukrainian. Beautiful, inside and out. After seeing we were going through water like CRAZY here- she said, “I will call for some water for you.” In her beautiful Ukrainian language she communicated with the person on the other end of the phone and ordered some large water cooler size water jugs for us which have saved us a fortune in water! (Adoptive Family tip: Don’t drink the water here!) When the delivery man showed up just after 7 am on Tuesday, he spoke only Russian/Ukrainian. I took a deep breath and said a little prayer for safety as I opened the door to a strange man speaking an unknown language. Whew, was I ever relieved when he, in fact, did have the water jugs with him and not a weapon!:) Without a single word in the same language, speaking to each other in our own languages, having no idea what the other person was saying yet speaking anyway, pointing and gesturing, we were able to communicate where we wanted the water jugs and how much I owed him. We’re getting better at this!
Side note: In these difficult language barriers, I often curse those impetuous Tower of Babel builders! In case that story is unfamiliar to you, these guys got a little “too big for their britches” and attempted to build a Tower to Heaven! God said, “I don’t think so.”
The Tower of Babel : Genesis 11:1-9
11 Now the whole earth had one language and one speech. 2 And it came to pass, as they journeyed from the east, that they found a plain in the land of Shinar, and they dwelt there. 3 Then they said to one another, “Come, let us make bricks and bake them thoroughly.” They had brick for stone, and they had asphalt for mortar. 4 And they said, “Come, let us build ourselves a city, and a tower whose top is in the heavens; let us make a name for ourselves, lest we be scattered abroad over the face of the whole earth.”
5 But the Lord came down to see the city and the tower which the sons of men had built. 6 And the Lord said, “Indeed the people are one and they all have one language, and this is what they begin to do; now nothing that they propose to do will be withheld from them. 7 Come, let Us go down and there confuse their language, that they may not understand one another’s speech.” 8 So the Lord scattered them abroad from there over the face of all the earth, and they ceased building the city. 9 Therefore its name is called Babel, because there the Lord confused the language of all the earth; and from there the Lord scattered them abroad over the face of all the earth.
So, confused language it is! We are praying for God to have mercy on those of us who are rescuing orphans with other languages and to help the learning to be smooth and rapid for all of us. Fortunately, since we are in contact with others who have adopted internationally we know from their experience that the kids are fluent in English quite rapidly after being submersed in it. Our Ukrainian friend Sl. also added something remarkable to our conversation about it yesterday. I was feeling sad about J.V. having to leave his Church and attempt to worship in a language not his own. She assured me that when she was 15 and spent a year in Pennsylvania as an exchange student with a Pastor and his family, she learned praise songs in English which made English her most comfortable worship language. She said that although Ukrainian is her first language, she still prefers worship songs in English. After she returned to Ukraine and attended a Protestant Church here, she heard some of the same songs she had learned in the US with Russian words. Interestingly, if visiting a Ukrainian Church, she now translates the lyrics into English in her head when she is worshipping! So, that gives me great comfort that our little J.V. will learn and love to worship in English since he is only 2 years younger than she was when she spent a year in the U.S.
Back to our day…. After the water man came and went, the cleaning lady startled me when she showed up an hour early! I decided that since the kids were still SOUND asleep, I would let them sleep a bit longer while she started cleaning elsewhere. I motioned to her a sleep motion and pointed to our bedroom, and she smiled sweetly appearing to understand me. I allowed the kids another hour in bed, but then woke them up so we could get ourselves out of Na.’s way. She got a kick out of Sv.’s nature collection for the wedding which had taken over part of the living room floor. She looked at me, pointing quizzically, and I shrugged and replied, “Sveno” which made her laugh!
Coffee House: We made our way out of the house and on to Coffee House, to grab some breakfast and see our FAVORITE Ukrainian server, Ox. It is so comforting to be at a restaurant we are using as a “home away from our home away from home” on Cleaning Lady day with a friend helping us. She took excellent care of us as always and J1 and I had the neat little Cottage Cheese cakes we have discovered here- mmmmm… The kids got Cacao to drink this time, not Hot Chocolate (puddingJ) and I had a delicious little pot of green tea. We spent about 2 hours there before we needed a change of scenery and went to visit P&J’s host family at their home. The F. family is another Embassy family who go to the same Church as our host. They are also an amazingly generous family who cares deeply for the orphans here and visits them monthly. E.F. had so kindly offered to allow us to come to her home on Cleaning Lady days, so on this particular cold rainy miserable day; we took her up on it! P&J were there packing so we kept to ourselves in the dining room with our electronics to keep us busy. It was such a blessing to have another safe place to spend a part of our day.
Sweet Ukrainian friends: At around 1pm, our new awesome friend Sl, was out of her college classes and came to join us on our adventures! We went for a quick, cheap lunch at a local café and then on to explore a mall across the street from the Circus. I was in search of “Alvin and the Chipmunks” in Russian, which we had seen earlier in a store with V. He really wanted it, but we decided to look for a better price. I have not seen it again, and am not sure where that first store was since we saw it in the first week here when everything was still so confusing. Fortunately for us, since we had Sl. with us yesterday, she asked one of the “underground vendors” if he had it! He had a DVD with not only Chipmunks but several other movies on one disk. We plan to check it out to make sure it really is what we think it isJ. Sl. also helped us figure out which bus to take back “up the hill” to get back to our home away from home as soon as it was time.
Plans: As of Tuesday afternoon, with one last US Embassy visit and a Medical exam for E., P&J had finally accomplished the last of their checklist on the quest to adopt E. Plans had been made to celebrate their last night in Kiev with fireworks, compliments with our Party master host, Sv. The Celebration was scheduled for 7 pm so I had to get home at 5pm and have some rest.
Naps and Visits: I HAD to have some rest after my 2 hours of sleep the night before, so we chatted about it on the bus ride home. On the way up the hill, Sl. asked if she could take the kids home with her to her dorm for the afternoon until we reconvened at 7 for the W. Family's celebration! What amazing friends we have made here! To have a 20 year old enjoy my kids so much that she asked to take them home with her for the afternoon- that is a true blessing! I returned to the apartment alone…..that was beyond WEIRD. The house was so eerily quiet, I couldn’t really sleep. I lay in bed and checked my email, then facebook, attempting to make myself drowsy. Eventually I dozed off for a few minutes and was grateful for the power nap. At about 6 pm, I woke up with a start and realized we didn’t really have a firm plan. We thought the party for the W. Family was going to take place at “Triangle Park” but Sv. decided with the time of day he preferred a different park. I wasn’t sure where that was, so I called P & J. P confidently told me, “Oh, that’s easy, you know where the old piano is on Artema?” “Yes”. “Well you turn down that alley beside that store…go through the building, then go right, then down another alley and you’ll be at the park.” P. is amazing with directions and learned his way around this city in no time flat. I was always in awe of his abilities here! By now it was dark though…and I was alone…there was NO way I was going out exploring dark alleys by myself to find this park.
Mysterious preparations and the Big Adventure: Fortunately, Sv. came home soon afterward, told me we were driving there and then began doing mysterious things. First, he hunted for a bag of microwave popcorn. Hmmmm…I supposed he was hungry. He worked and worked with the new microwave, with two different bags of popcorn trying to get it to work. This microwave has no instructions, in English or Cyrillic, only mysterious buttons which have photos of waves, wind, hmmm…not really sure what the photos mean. We usually just guess and push start- and it works ok. But for some reason the popcorn was not cooperating…but Sv. was determined. I wondered why he was so determined to have a popcorn snack before we left since I had never seen him eat popcorn, but he was unrelenting. J Next, he went into his room and turned on some Contemporary Christian music....then he cranked it up. Hmmmm.. I also don't think I have ever heard him play music before. But it was a nice song and I was grateful it was breaking up the eerie silence without the kids. On our way out the door he asked if we had any kid beverages and I told him all of our juice was consumed by our dinner guests the night before;)…so no…only water. So he grabbed one of his Yogurt smoothies he had and off we went. Meanwhile, Sl and the kids were on their way to us via a bus stuck in traffic. They decided it was taking too long so they got off and walked…then ran…then walked. Eventually their bus got ‘unstuck” and passed them! So they decided to make a mad dash back for the next bus stop…flying along through dirt and mud to get there…and JUST missed it! Always an adventure here! They decided to park their breathless selves at that bus stop and wait for the next bus…which brought them to the triangle park JUST as we were driving through it! Wow, thank you God! We were sitting at that intersection and here came Sl., Ab. J1 & An. flying across the grassy median and piling into the backseat alongside the big box of fireworks and the folding chair! Their winded renditions of their adventures entertained us as we drove to Mosaic park for the celebration. This park was tucked in behind a building we have been walking by for 4 weeks! We had NO idea it was back there! From what I could tell in the pitch dark it is big and beautiful with an amazing overlook and a playground and several walking trails! We all piled out and huddled under our umbrellas to avoid the cold mist which was showering us. We called P & J and said, “We’re here” and P said, “So are we”. Hmmm..all I saw in the darkness was two ladies with strollers….definitely not P&J. We had a comical exchange of phone calls attempting to locate one another and soon our mist soaked parties were united. Our partial family (myself, Ab., Jo. & An.), Sv. & Sl., with P&J&E, the F. family and awesome Ox. from Coffee House. We had finally found each other for:
A Night to Remember: Finally, the mysterious popcorn, smoothie, and chair made sense as Sv. went to work seating the little guest of honor, E. in the folding chair in the center of our group. Sv. presented E. with the hard-earned popcorn and the smoothie and we all got photos. While we were distracted by the photo opportunity, Sv. set up his iphone and speakers and fired up the song he had been playing earlier, “Your Love” by Brandon Heath. That did it. Music just takes me to another level. All of a sudden the scene went from a mere fun gathering to a true event to remember. It was a God moment.
Sv. lit the fireworks in a box and the show began. It was amazing. Tears were flowing freely for most and we all stood in our circle realizing that this amazing crowd will never, ever again be recreated. P & J shared a few words of thanks and good-byes with the group, then we all hugged and cried some more. We are so glad good-bye isn’t forever for us with P&J since we live near each other in FL. But seeing them go away from us here in this foreign land, when they were such an enormous part of our journey, was extremely difficult. A heavy loneliness, which had already crept in when my husband left, became heavier pondering the W. family departing at 6 am, less than 12 hours away from that moment. The W. family, with a little help from Sv., then lit a luminary candle and released it into the night sky to say good-bye to Ukraine. It was beautiful. 
After the luminary launch, E. showcased his rapping skills! He does a little beatbox noise and adds in a few words and gestures. He is quite the little showman and has a remarkable command of a crowd for a little 3 1/2 foot person!:) Following E’s performance, Sv. asked us to grab hands around a circle and he prayed for E. and the W. family and thanked God for this incredible Circle of Friends who He has united from all over the world. Last night will forever be etched in our minds. Before we all parted ways, sweet Ir. and Sa. joined our group and said their good-byes to P&J&E, too.
The Girls, Sl. & Sa. with the W. Family.
Sadly, while at P & J’s celebration, we learned that Ox. had decided to resign from Coffee House and go in a different direction. We adore her and wish her all the best. We aren’t sure what to do with ourselves next Monday without her at Coffee House…but God knows what’s in storeJ.
After the celebration, the W. Family went home with their host family and we went home with ours. Sv. & Ir. went on a date, so "The Girls" came over with the kids and I for a mysterious “pantry surprise” dinner. J I had forgotten to exchange any money yesterday, so we were unable to go out to eat or buy groceries. We had lots of fun digging things out of the refrigerator and pantry with much laughter and ended up eating sliced tomatoes, carrots, peppers and cucumbers, along with some noodles, an omelette and 15 meatballs! Hilarious! Our mystery dinner was made all the more special by fun and laughter with The Girls. Love those girls and really don’t want to leave them.
After dinner Sv. and Ir. returned and opened a BIG box which had arrived full of Wedding supplies! The Girls all dug out item after item wrapped in bubble wrap chattering away in giddy Ukrainian. I don’t know what they were saying, but it was EXCITING!:) Michael’s Craft Store in FL was very happy to see Sv. & Ir. while they were in the States a few weeks ago! The fall foliage, gorgeous candles, and purple accents now fill the window sill in preparation for Sv. & Ir.’s special day – only 31 days away now!
A foot warming party in the big tub after our chilly, wet adventure in the park!
The entertaining Sv.!:)
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Today we slept in and worked on catching up around here with some laundry, much needed rest and this blog. At 11:30 am our time, and 4:30 am FL time, we Skyped with Weej!!J Tonight we are having Taco Dinner, a meal not common here, for Sv. I would say not much more is going to happen today…but with Sv., the Man of Mystery and King of Adventure, that is impossible to guarantee. J
As I wait to be reunited with my second son tomorrow, I am pondering another strange parallel to having a new baby. Although I think by the time I had An. 10 years ago, policies in hospitals were changing more to the “rooming in” concept, when I had Ab. & Jo. 15 & 13 years ago respectively the nurses took the babies to the nursery at night and often during the day so new Moms could get some rest. Fortunately, when I had Ab., I was in the hospital where I had worked for 2 years and knew the OB nurses. So when they took her to the nursery for a while at night so I could sleep, it was a peaceful sleep, for a couple of hours anyway, knowing she was in good hands. I sort of feel that way now in our days without our little J.V. His return to the orphanage for the week was unavoidable and a bit like the caring nurses taking my new baby to the nursery. It is difficult to part with him each time as he returns to his school for the week, but I know that the orphanage where he has been is an amazing one, as orphanages go. God assured me in 2006, in a rather mysterious and miraculous way, that He had my boy safely in His arms until the time was right. So seeing this place and meeting these people for the first time was nearly a spiritual experience. God HAS been caring for my boy for all of these years, through the loving arms of beautiful people like R. and V.'s foster Mom, Sv., who love and honor God. Wow. God continues to amaze me. So I am patiently waiting now for the process to be complete and the “nurses” to bring my “baby” to me for the last time so we can drive away with one more little passenger and start our new lives.
Tomorrow is IT! Tomorrow, the Orphanage is throwing a Good-bye party for V. and we get to bring him to our “home away from home” with us for good until we head back to the U.S.! I wonder if it is a little bittersweet for him. Going into adoption, it is tempting to think only of rescuing a child who needs a family. And that we are…but there is more to it. Adoption is complex. International adoption seems even more complex due to the language issues. This child has not just been sitting in a dismal room for 6 years waiting for his Mom and Dad to come. He has a school, and friends and pets and foster parents and foster siblings. And they understand him. Tomorrow he will say good-bye to all of them, pack his suitcase and leave his little room forever. Wow. So, as happy as he is to have found a family, I am sure this transition is bittersweet. He has been asked by several of the adults and officials before and since our time here if he wanted to be adopted, to leave Ukraine and live in the US, to which he always replies wholeheartedly, "yes". We are so thankful for Skype and email, etc. which will enable him to keep him in contact with his friends here. And we are thankful for his friends who have also been adopted and will remain a part of our lives in the U.S. Having moved around all of my life, I've had to say good-bye to a lot of friends and schools, too. Every move was initially difficult, but each allowed me to meet new and amazing people who I would not have otherwise met. Several of the friends I left are still a part of my life today. So he'll be OK....well, more than OK. We're a family now!:)
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